I’ve never heard this before....so I have to share it with you.

I made an appointment with a dermatologist because my elbows have been cracking and just plain UG-O-LY looking and no matter what I did, I wasn’t able to make them smooth. And I would just love having ‘smooth as a baby’s bottom’ elbows before the springtime.

The appointment was last week. After getting a prescription for some magic elbow cream the doctor asked if I needed him to look at anything else.

I was about to say "no" when I realized that I had a small, mildly annoying, red, dry patch of skin on my back for the past year or longer.

As soon as he lifted my shirt he said, "That’s cancer". (As if I should have known.)

Just like that.

So, yesterday I went to a skin cancer specialist in New York City to treat Basal Cell Carcinoma.

It’s cancer, but not life threatening.

The specialist did a recipe of electricity, cyrosurgery, laser surgery and a dash of radiation. It’s all taken care of and it is all gone now.

During the electricity part of the procedure, I started feeling faint and told the nurse. They immediately had me lay on my stomach and in turning over I grabbed the metal side of the bed and received a painful jolt of electricity, enough to numb my left arm for a few minutes. Of course, only this type of thing could happen to me.

Anyway, I can’t help but think that there has to be someone else out there who is as ill-informed as me when it comes to this type of thing.

If you ever have a red, dry patch of skin that does not go away, get is checked out immediately.

Oh yeah, and don’t go and touch anything metal if you ever receive electro dessication treatment, unless you like that kind of thing.

What would you do?

Let’s say you are being interviewed by two lawyers for a job and the male lawyer excuses himself. When he returns his fly is open. The other lawyer, a female, says nothing as the male lawyer walks around the room.

Do you say something?
Or do you remain quiet?

Let’s say the next time you meet with this pair of attorneys for your second interview, the male attorney has a pea-sized glob of blue gel toothpaste on the corner of his mouth. The female attorney obviously sees it, yet says nothing, knowing that this attorney is about to head off to court like this.

Do you say something?

Or do your remain quiet?

The pair have been partners for a few years.

What would you do?

Just Roll Your Eyes, I Always Do...

YNB: Babe, look out side, there’s a deer in the backyard.

CAPT: Wow, look at that.

YNB: It looks like a young buck.

CAPT: No, it’s fifty cents.

Guess What?

I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!

I am still amazed at the timing of the whole thing, God's hand was all over this.

Thanks for all your prayers.

I am so happy. It's been a long transition and I can't wait to be settled in with my new life.

I AM INSANE, RIGHT?

I did something very bold on Friday, or insane, either way, I'm glad I did.

Many of you know that I have worked as a paralegal, in another state, for so many years I can't even remember. I have lived in Connecticut since May of this year. Crazy, right? The commute (2.5 hours) is wearing me out. My sister has been gracious enough to let me stay with her during the week so that I don't have to drive home, but I live out of a suitcase all week. My weekends are spent in CT and I get upset every Monday morning when I leave my home to go back to NY. (Although my neice and nephew come running to me with big hugs and smiles when they see me, that makes it more worth while.)

A few weeks ago I gave my company notice that I will be leaving. Even know they knew this day would be coming sometime, they freaked out a little and asked if I'd stay until January 1st. I kind of agreed by stating, "I'll do my best." (At least I've learned a few things about the art of lawyering...)

Since then I've been interviewing replacements for my job on Thursdays. And I've been going on interviews in CT on Fridays. Thereby enjoying the benefit of long, three day weekends.

I haven't been getting a good feeling about some of the jobs I've seen or been offered in CT. Even though they know that I am not familiar with the types of law and procedures and they are willing to take a chance on hiring me, the jobs don't seem right for me.

Panic started sinking in last week when I realized that the jobs that are hiring are for corporate positions and I'm not the 'corporate' type. And parking fees for corporate jobs are expensive, some are over $250 per month! I'm used to working around the corner and coming home for lunch. Not only that but $250 would cut into my shoe and handbag expense and I just can't have that, right?

Also, I'm used to being in charge, being the boss...it's going to be a huge adjustment to not be in charge at work.

More importantly, I want to do the same thing I've been doing, I feel more comfortable doing the same thing and I will feel more confident doing the same type of job.

So Friday, I put on a suit, got my brief case, put a nice, crisp resume inside it and drove to a local firm that specializes in Family Law. I said a prayer and walked inside.

I had been driving past this firm for a few years. I've been asking local attorneys about them and their reputation since I moved in. I've been searching the internet and newspapers for jobs that they might be offering, to no avail. Ever since I've moved here, I've wanted to work there. It would be the easiest transition for me. And I know that my experience would be a great asset to them.

The receptionist gave me a big smile when I told her why I was there. She brought me into the waiting area and told me that the partners will be in to see me in a few minutes.

"Strange", I thought, they didn't even know that I was coming. It is very unusual for an attorney practicing family law to be available on a Friday (visitation issues are high priority on Fridays), no less two attorneys being available at the same time.

When they came in they had looks of amazement on their faces. They both commented on how unusual it was that I would just walk in and ask for a job. It seems that they both had just then at that exact moment decided to hire a paralegal and were discussing it together.

They both commented on how weird it was that they were both free to sit and talk to me for the two hours that they did because the past two months have been crazy with trials and their workload has been overwhelming.

I liked them immediately. They showed me around (which is always a good sign) and asked when I would be available to start, if, of course, they decide to hire me. When I told them January 1st, they said that is when they would need me to start.

They seemed to like what I had to offer them, not that they were looking for someone who could do the things I can. They even seemed okay with the salary I am looking for, even though they weren't planning to hire someone for that salary. They said that they would have to create a position for me, something new that they never tried before.

I told them how much I am interested in the job and the firm, how I feel like the other jobs offered to me just didn't feel right....how I've never just walked into a firm and asked for a job but I just felt so compelled to.

So, now I wait to hear from them.

And I am totally amazed that I did something so brazen and bold.

This past weekend I went shopping at Walmart.

If anyone reading this knows me personally then you must be scratching your head right now because Walmart is not where I usually shop, ever, because Walmart scares me....the confusion, the sales, the merchandise.

But my life has changed. I now am living in a rural town and any kind of store is hard to come by.

More importantly, some of your posts have convinced me that shopping at Walmart is a fun and happy thing. And I thank you for that, because you are right. I stand corrected. Walmart is a shopping experience that I am feeling more comfortable about.

Capt, me and the kids walked into Walmart and immediately rallied around a huge container of DVD’s for sale. ‘2 for $10', what a bargain!

The container of DVD’s were all scattered around, haphazardly, careless, willy nilly, in a messy, unorganized pile. We all dug down deep in the pit of never-ending DVD’s and pulled out a few worthy ones.

As we looked at our picks, deciding which 2 we wanted to purchase, I posed a question to my loved ones:

"Is it just me, or does anyone else have an uncontrollable desire to organize all of these into a neat, organized, alphabetical pile?"

*Crickets*

*weird looks*

And finally: "Um, no, Theresa, that’s just NOT right.", said the boy, adamantly disagreeing with me.

Thus marking the first time in the 3 years that I’ve known him, to take a stand against my unique (his words, not mine) quirks.

Curvin' It Again

For the past couple of months, I've been working out at Curves, again.

I'm sleeping better and feeling better. I feel like I'm even walking straighter and stronger.

There's only one problem... there should be a warning on this piece of glute equipment:EXCESSIVE USE OF THIS EQUIPMENT WILL DEFINATELY STENGHTHEN YOUR GLUTES TO THE EXTENT THAT FROM NOW ON WHENEVER YOU WALK YOUR PANTIES WILL GRAVITATE OVER YOUR NEWLY FORMED MUSCLES AND WILL BE WEDGED IN THE CRACK OF YOUR BUTTOCKS.

I think I may have to write a letter to the company.

The New Generation of Fashion Police

I woke up this morning, made some cornbread and left for the gym.

When I got back I ate, took my shower and got dressed.

I put on a nice brown skirt, brown sweater, stockings and brown boots. I was feeling all together.

When I walked out of the bedroom all ready for work my 3 year old nephew, who just learned how to talk in complete sentences, stopped me in my tracks.

"You wearin’ THAT Aunt Terri?" he asked me as he squinted his eyes at me and held his hand up towards my face.

"Yes, is this outfit a problem?" "Does it not work?" "Should I change?" I asked him.

"Yes, no like it Aunt Terri", he said as if he was the fashion police, "Change!"

I’m pretty sure I’ve just experienced one of the most insulting moments, yet funny moments of my life from a 3 year old boy.