Thanks for Giving Me ‘The Clap’

{That’s the title of this post and I’m sticking with it. }

The past few weeks have been a whirlwind.

My house is finally in contract to sell, YES, but it’s been stressful getting all the proper documents together since STUPID me threw them out a few months back when I was cleaning out my closet. I don’t know what made me do it but I kind of remember doing it and stupidly thinking that I won’t be using any of these old real estate files anymore. STUPID. STUPID. STUPID.

I’ll just blame that one on old age and move on.

Then there’s the fact that I’m in contract to purchase a house in Connecticut. CT has very different procedures for purchasing and selling real estate. And I’m constantly trying to not be confused -which I do everyday of my life.... but now I get to do it in another STATE!!!!

Today I have to write a letter to the sellers asking them questions about certain repairs that were done on the house, weird, right?

But, the house is my dream house! And it is in move-in condition. And it’s on almost 2 beautiful acres.... with a brook in the backyard. And the kitchen is, well, I get all teary when I even think about how absolutely awesome it is.

Oh and the two tier deck has a place for a hot tub. Hot tubs rule. Especially when you are chatting with God as the sun is rising....I miss that.

Now where was I? Oh yeah, the title of this post..... I almost forgot.

My son, Dave came out this weekend and stayed in his room all day finishing up a play he’s been working on for months. He came downstairs to grab something to eat and started telling me about the play. It has something to do with people wanting to be brilliant, so this company advertises for a drug that can make you brilliant, blah, blah, blah. Then these people become brilliant and gifted, blah, blah, blah. They are compared to Mozart and others, blah, blah, blah. Then they die. And it’s discovered that they die from an STD that is contracted directly from the drugs that make them brilliant.

"Oh, I see", I say, "You give them ‘The Clap’.

Just then my son’s jaw actually drops, his eye’s widen and he starts doing the ‘The Happy Dance’ right there in the kitchen. The dog joins in and all of the sudden it’s all:

FESTIVE IN THE HOUSE


Ahem.

He tells me that he was wracking his brain to come up with a catchy acronym for the drug and I just saved him hours and hours of work. He now looks like a weight has been lifted off of his shoulders.

So when he packed up and went to kiss me goodbye he grabbed my shoulders with his outstretched arms, tenderly looked into my eyes and said, "Thanks for giving me ‘The Clap’, Mom, I love you".

I just stepped back and laughed because - where ever are you ever, in your whole entire life, ever going to hear THAT sentence?